Kishore Kumar – the KK Kolony
This article is by Anupam Tiwari.
Recently, “baatonbaatonmein” all the die hard KK fans decided to talk only KK related things and nothing non-kk related things at all. They also decided to establish a KK Colony in the memory of their beloved KK. The Colony used to have usual names and life style as any other Colony but then the die hard KK fans thought that was not KK related. So they decided to change everything to become KK-related. They first started by changing the city name to “KK Kolony”. They then started by changing every other major establishment in the city (like airport, railway station) to Kishore Kumar Airport and Kishore Kumar Terminus.
With such changes continuing, soon we had…
My name is Kishore Kumar. My father’s name is Kishore Kumar. My mother’s name is Kishore Kumar. My brothers, sisters, uncles and aunts are all named Kishore Kumar. All other names have long since been outlawed. I wake up everyday at 6:30 am (Kishore Standard Time) to go to my school: Kishore Kumar Vidyalaya. It was a little confusing getting there at first, because all schools in the city have the same name. But once I got directions, it was fine. All I have to do is go down Kishore Kumar Road, make a left turn at Kishore Kumar Chowk, go straight till Kishore Kumar Marg, until I reach Kishore Kumar Road. Then I go straight till I come to Kishore Kumar Chowk. Once, I got lost and found myself at Kishore Kumar Road instead of Kishore Kumar Road. Silly mistake, when I think about it.
My class teacher, Mr K Kumar, is a good teacher. Today he asked, “Kishore, can you answer that question?” and the whole class started up to answer. Yesterday our school, KK Vidyalaya, had a cricket match with our rival school, KK Vidyalaya. Of course, we don’t know which school won…but the winners were announced.
This weekend, my family and I went to the zoo, Kishore Kumar Praanibaugh, which was recently renovated and inaugurated by our Prime Minister Kishore Kumar. One of my cousin, Kishore Kumar got sick there and we had to take him to the Kishore Rugnalaya, in front of the KK Praanibaagh, across the Kishore Kumar Bridge. Dr Kishore K. said he was suffering from Kishore Kumar desease (named after Dr. KK who first discovered it) and that he must take a course of Kishore Kumar tablets, twice a day, for one week. If it doesn’t help then he must discontinue with Kishore Kumar tablets and should instead take Kishore Kumar tablets for the rest of the week.
We have two main telecommunication companies, KKNL and KKNL. One provides telephone services and the other provides broadband MultiNet access via the Kishore Kumar Satellite. Sometimes we don’t know whether we’re accessing a website or whether Kishore Kumar (our grandmother) is calling up. I’ll go online later to see if I have any new e-mail at firstname.lastname@example.org
Foreigners are often confused which Paanch Sitaara Vyayamshala (5- ishtar hotel) to stay in, because they all have the same names. I think the Kishore Kumar Vishramgraha is pretty good, and one should stay there rather than the Kishore Kumar Vishramgraha or Kishore Kumar Vishramgraha.
During the weekend, my family and I might go to the beach, the Kishore Kumar Samudrakinar and might eat in that Kishore Kumar restaurent near Kishore Kumar restaurent. After that we may go see a film starring Kishore Kumar. He is a better actor than the Kishore Kumar or Kishore Kumar and he doesn’t copy that old Kishore Kumar. Moreover, this movie scores over others since its music is being given by Kishore Kumar and all the songs are sung by Kishore Kumar and Kishore Kumar. One duet by Kishore Kumar and Kishore Kumar is my personal favourite.
I go to sleep pretty early, after watching the popular TV show “Kishore Kumar bhi kabhi Kishore Kumar tha”. Tomorrow will be another day…I think.
Sometimes, in whispers, I hear stories told of a mythical age long ago, when places and things had different names. Stories of a time when each thing had it’s own name, and of a concept called “heterogeneity”. It’s a legend, only half-believed, of a time when places and things had a history, and individuals an identity.
Damroo Kishore Kumar (aka Anupam Tiwari)
PS: a bombayite would like to see “Chhatrapati Shivaji” instead of Kishore Kumar.